


Signaling through the flames

by attachiantenephilim



Series: Let's fangirl with shadowhunters and downworlders [4]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Immortal Magnus Bane, Insecure Alec Lightwood, Insecure Magnus Bane, Jealous Magnus Bane, M/M, Maybe immortal Alec lateeeer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 13:04:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14379246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/attachiantenephilim/pseuds/attachiantenephilim
Summary: After the events of the 3x05 episode. Alec is still upset about Magnus’s box of momentos, especially after a stupid fight they had at breakfast. Things get better eventually. But the only solution to their problems can be summed up in a single word: Communication.





	Signaling through the flames

**Author's Note:**

> ENGLISH IS NOT MY MOTHER TONGUE SORRY FOR THE MISTAKES

“This is all because you’re the only guy I’ve ever been with.” Alec finally scolded while they were fighting again during their breakfast.

“You’re putting words in my mouth.” Magnus sighed, truly exhausted of going on this subject over and over again.

“I’m not a child, Magnus!”

“Then stop acting like one!” The warlock snapped and that was it. Alec stormed out of the table and went to their bedroom, not without slamming the door loudly. He cursed while getting dressed for the day. And it was definitely going to be a shitty day.

 

* * *

 

“Everything’s fine, big brother?” Izzy asked him when he arrived at the Institute. She knew Alec by heart and could see when something was wrong.

“I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not. Is it about Magnus?” She queried, knowing only the warlock could have such an impact on her brother’s mood.

“It is, but… Please, I just don’t want to talk about it.” Izzy nodded with a comprehensive smile and went behind his desk to hug his seating figure.

“If you change your mind, you know where to find me. Love you.”

“Love you too.” He answered with a little smile then she left, letting him alone with his thoughts and fears.

Because it was what it was: fear. The fear of losing Magnus, the fear of meaning nothing to him or just a stupid item he would put on his box after his death. Then, Magnus would just… move on. Meet someone else. Alec knew he was being a little bit irrational, Magnus wasn’t this cruel person moving from a person to another. The warlock had told him several times that Alec has unlocked something in him and was the first person he fell in love with, since over a century.

He shook his head to refocus. Time to do his job.

 

* * *

 

The paperwork seemed to never stop and after four hours, Alec finally took a break, already tired. Also, he couldn’t stop thinking about Magnus and their whole situation. Usually, the warlock would drop by for them to eat together, but something told him that he wouldn’t come today… Not after their fight of this morning.

“Sir? Am I interrupting?” A male voice startled him, and he glances toward it to see it was Underhill, standing at the door. Alec got his act together and greeted him. He actually appreciated the blonde shadowhunter, especially since he thanked Alec the other day for coming out.

“No, not at all. Is there a problem?”

“I just wanted to inform you about the cameras at the back of the Institute, that we should replace. It would be more practical for the night patrols.”

“Good. It will be made at the end of the day. Anything else?”

“Well… I don’t mean to overstep, but… are you alright, sir?” Underhill asked with genuine concern but still standing tall, his hands clutched behind his back.

“I am. Just… a rough day.”

“I understand. Would you like to… talk about it over a drink?”

Alec, startled by the invitation, thought about refusing, thinking it could be inappropriate as he’s the Head of the Institute, and because he has a boyfriend. But he could see Underhill was just being a good person and that he’d no weird intentions.

“Okay.” He accepted with a smile. “ Let’s go.”

 

* * *

 

Magnus was also having a bad day. His clients were rotten pricks, and his magic was feeling weak today. And, well… Alec. He couldn’t stop thinking of how the shadowhunter left this morning, and how he felt an aching pounding on his chest ever since. He didn’t want the immortality’s issue to create a wedge between them, like it did for so many past lovers before. But… Magnus shouldn’t compare them to Alec.

Firstly, because it was exactly what Alec didn’t want, and secondly? Because the Lightwood boy was different, so different than the others… And he wanted Alec to know it. The warlock sighed, as he put back one of his many books in his library. He then took his cellphone but didn’t know if it was a good idea to call Alec. Maybe he was busy or was too mad at him to respond… So he decided to text a safe bet.

‘ _Hey darling Isabelle. Is Alexander busy?_ ’

‘ ** _Hi Magnus! No, he went out two hours ago to have a drink with a friend_**.’

At that, Magnus frowned. The text itself was already odd. Alec was pretty reluctant about alcohol except for his cocktails, and he knew Alec got along with many people but… who? He just decided he would ask.

‘ _Oh, may I know with who he is_?’

‘ ** _I think it’s Underhill, he’s a good guy from the Institute’s security_** ’

Aaaaaand that was when Magnus lost it. Well, not really but unconsciously, he clenched his fists. Alec had talked to him about Underhill, telling him how he thanked Alec because he inspired him to come out as well, and how he respected his relationship with Magnus.

Looks like despite this respect, the shadowhunter was feeling at ease with _his_ shadowhunter.

Magnus shouldn’t be jealous, and usually he never was, even in the past. But suddenly, he remembered what Alec had said this morning during their fight: ‘ _This is all because you’re the only guy I’ve ever been with._ ’ Magnus unclenched his fists when he realized he was squeezing so hard that he had marks on his palms. Now there was nothing to do but wait for Alec to come back. If he does. And apparently, someone should have heard his thoughts because ten minutes, he heard the door open. Magnus stayed in his seat, not even turning his head towards the door and the steps approaching him. Instead, he kept on drinking his martini.

“Hello.” A low voice finally said, and Magnus finally faced Alec, who were removing his jacket and stele.

“May I ask where were you?” Magnus asked with a tone, almost gloomy.

“Hunter’s Moon.”

“And with Underhill from what I gather.”

“Yes, he asked me to go out for a drink and I said yes.”

“Oh, well. Amazing. Fantastic. Good for you. I’m sure you had a blast opening up about our problems to your fellow shadowhunter.” Magnus railed, sarcasm being heard in his voice. And at that, Alec snorted, crossing his arms.

“Come on, really? You’re jealous? It’s the world upside down.”

“Are we really going back on this subject again, Alec?” Magnus said, standing up to confront the tallest. He was really pissed off now. “Because my patience is wearing thin!”

“You’re being ridiculous. I was upset, and a friend was here to listen, that’s all! Just because I confided in Theo, doesn’t mean I-“

“Oh, Theo! I’m glad to see you became close enough to call yourselves by your names!”

“By the _fucking_ Angel, Magnus, Theo Underhill has a partner, a boyfriend with who he’s been with for six years, and with who he can now live happily thanks to us!” Alec finally exploded.

Silence. And Magnus was feeling like an idiot right now. Alec was looking at him with irritation as he dropped himself on the couch. But Magnus, being the hardheaded man was, wasn’t finished:

“Fine. But don’t think everything is forgiven, Alexander. We still need to talk about this morning and the fact that you won’t let go of the box’s topic.”

“Don’t.” Alec warned, sensing the stress and the exhaustion of the day coming up to his body. And he didn’t want to say things he could regret later.

“Well I’m so, so sorry if Mister Head of the New York Institute is not in the mood, but we need to clarify things. And you need to understand that my immortality isn’t-“

“ _I KNOW IT!_ ” Alec screamed, shooting on something on the floor and Magnus realized it was his bow. He startled because of the scream Alec made. The one and only time Alec had screamed at him was when Jace disappeared with Valentine. He got scared for a moment but it faded when he saw Alec was in the verge of crying.

“Magnus, I… I know it. I know that you’re immortal, I know that you have a past and other lovers before me. And I-I would never, ever, want you to shut off about them because those are people and experiences who made the beautiful person I know you are.” Alec ranted with a hoarse voice. His eyes got blurry because of the tears forming in his eyes. “I’ve known all of this since the beginning, since our first date… And I accept it, I swear I do… But it doesn’t mean that it’s not _hard_ , sometimes.”

He broke in tears at this last sentence and was tempted to run away to their bedroom or something, because he didn’t want Magnus to see him like this, because he wanted to stay strong… But he needed to be honest, true, in front of his lover. Magnus was watching him, his mouth agape and his eyes glossy. “Al-Alexander, I…”

“I love, _you_.” Alec cut him, accentuating the word you. Tears were still flowing on his cheeks. “Shadowhunters only love once, Magnus, and to me… You’re the one. I know you love me too but… The question is, do you love me as much as I love you, or am I going to be a simple momento in your box?”

This time, Alec didn’t stay any longer and went to the bedroom, letting Magnus with his own tears.

‘ _Magnus Bane… You’re officially the greatest asshole of all times._ ’ He thought to himself before crying his eyes out on the couch.

Minutes went by, and almost an hour later when they both cried their pain separately, Magnus decided to make the first move. He had a lot of things to say, too. He opened the bedroom’s door carefully, and saw Alec was laying on the bed, his back facing the door. His body was still shaking with tears and Magnus just couldn’t take it anymore… He laid beside his boyfriend and spooned, wrapping his arm around the Nephilim’s waist, hoping he wouldn’t reject him. Seeing no sign of rejection, he started to whisper in his ear:

“I’ll always remember the day I first saw you at Pandemonium. Your siblings, Clary and hundred of clubbers were here, but at this very moment… You were the one I was seeing. It was like they were all gone. Then, I saw you again that same night, at my former loft where you saved me for the second time.”

“More like medium-rare…” Alec murmured with a raspy voice, but it made Magnus grin. He remembered. Magnus slowly grasped Alec’s chin to look at him in the eyes. Eventually, Alec turned around and they were facing each other, their body touching.

“When we introduced each other, when you smiled at me all flustered… My heartbeats had like, accelerated. And I thought you were the most beautiful human being I’ve ever seen on several centuries. At the time, I figured it was just an attraction and I was determinate to get to know you… But now, I can tell put words on this moment.”

Their gazes were only on each other, they could feel the other’s breathing and Magnus was still whispering so quietly, that it was like they were on a comfort zone.

“I’ve been in love with you since the day we met, Alexander Lightwood. And I’m aware that I can be… distant in our relationship, or like I don’t want to initiate things myself. But it’s not because I love you less, no such thing… I’m just… scared because no one has ever cared for me as much as you do. And I’ve never fallen so fast and so quickly for someone like this, before.”

Alec stopped counting how many times they cried today, but this time it was tears of joy. “Magnus…”

“I’m not finished yet, my love.” The warlock grinned, entwining theirs fingers “Just… know that I don’t what the future holds for us, but I’m sure I want a future with you. You’re worth thousands of momentos boxes, Alexander.”

They fell in each other’s arms, both sighing in relief. They kissed passionately, transmitting all the love in them.

“I love you… I’m sorry for everything during these last two days.”

“I love you too my darling…” Magnus answered, kissing him in the neck near his deflect rune.

“Oh, and Magnus?”

“Hm?”

“You’re the cutest when you’re jealous…” They burst out laughing, and as tired as they both were, they spent the entire night cuddling, talking and making love like tomorrow was their last day.

And immortal or not, they were going to be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! The episode and the next one's trailer broke my heart so I needed to fix this ahah
> 
> Bye, lovelies!


End file.
